Well if you were hoping for some light hearted chat then unfortunately this is not the post for you. This is almost an extension of my last post. Most of the time I’m pretty easy going and will make a joke about something to see me through but the truth is that being a mum is bloody hard. 6months feels like not only a massive milestone for her but me as a parent.
I don’t think I misconceived the job, I just don’t think I had seriously thought about it. Never did I ever consider that I wouldn’t one day be a mum – my whole life has probably been built up to this. If people asked me what I wanted to be most in this life my answer (apart from obviously a millionaire) was always a mum. I don’t come across as the most maternal person (well I don’t think I do) although I do like to know everyone around me is ok. I don’t think I’ve ever excelled at childcare (having only babysat a handful of times). I was a rainbow leader for a short period in my teens. None of this prepared me (or made me think twice) about becoming a mum. I think in my head it was forgone conclusion.
I understand now that actually, nothing in life is a forgone conclusion (I have my divorce to thank for that). I was lucky, we didn’t struggle to have our daughter. We so easily could have. So many do and go through what I can only imagine is gut wrenching misery to seek the joy that is parenthood.
So let’s be honest about the first 6 months of motherhood (parenthood if you will). It’s a bit repetitive, you don’t really know what day it is unless your going to work (those who are lucky enough to escape for a few hours), you drink a lot of coffee (if you didn’t drink coffee before this will definitely make you learn quickly how to) and you spend a lot of time jingling maracas (not a euphemism) at a baby whose not even looking at you.
Obviously there are the cute highs – the first smile (that you know isn’t wind), when they giggle (like a proper belly giggle) and then the love (they love you even when you put their nappy on wrong, dress them in a questionable outfit and haven’t washes your hair for what seems like weeks).
The first six months is hard. It will out pressure on your relationship. You will wonder what you did this for. Then one day the will roll over and your heart will feel like it’s gonna burst with pride. Every day is a new adventure and frankly the next six months will no doubt be doubly as hard (she will started moving and we are not even close to baby proofed) but hey nobody ever called parenthood boring, it is
From the exhausted mummy and her eye bags